Okay, I’m just going to come right out and say it … I’m a scaredy cat. Flat out, yellow bellied wuss of the nth degree. And yes, that includes horror movies and ghost stories. But that’s not the fear I’m chatting about today.
I’m talking about the fear of failure.
Now don’t get me wrong … I love a new challenge. I’ll try most things at least once. (Multiple times if it’s fun 😉 ) What I’m afraid of is my manuscript. Yep, I said it. The thought of opening that puppy and staring down at the blinking cursor raises my blood pressure and starts my heart a-fluttering (and not in a good way). It didn’t used to be that way. I used to be able to sit down at the computer and happily pound out scene after scene in ignorant bliss. Not so much anymore.
I’ve learned enough about the correct way to craft a story that I worry I’m not doing it quite right. (Not that there aren’t lots of nuances of “correct”, but that’s a blog for another day.)
I love my stories and I’m really proud of them. I have fallen in love with the characters even as they have fallen in love with each other. But now I worry. Will this story be as good as the first (or second) in the series? Will the readers relate to the characters and love them as much as I do? Will they cry during this scene? What if …
Yeah, there it is … WHAT IF I can’t do it again? (See? My knees went a little weak there?) I know … it’s so dumb. Because if I’d just open that document and start typing the words will flow (well, as much as they do for me) and all would be right with my world. (And my editor. *g*) I know the more I’m away from it, the harder it will be to return. Like every other muscle, my brain needs exercise. And just like how easy it is NOT to go to the gym, I can fritter away the whole day without adding one sentence to my manuscript.
Bad. Bad Me!
Okay, so this is it, me kicking myself in my arse and opening my manuscript and working on it. That cursor isn’t going to intimidate me today. It can blink like Rudolph’s shiny nose and I’m not going to run from it. Because in reality … no publisher ever published an unwritten book! LOL!
How about you, what scares you the most and how do you overcome it?
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