I don’t get it. Seriously, I never understood why anyone would want to hold on to negativity.

You know what I mean. We see it nearly every day. Whether it’s in your office, a chat online or more recently comments on a YouTube video.  I don’t get it.

Now please don’t get me wrong. Sometimes life just sucks and you have to vent. No problem. Go for it. Holding on to that isn’t good for you either. Spew. Get it out and get over it. Everyone has the right to have a bad day now and again.

What I’m talking about is the people who are just plain negative. It hangs over them like a nasty black cloud. They have nothing nice to say. Of course, most Negative Nellies have no idea they’re doing it. It’s just a part of who they are. And I gotta tell you … I don’t have the energy to deal with them.

I think some of this new fad of saying nasty things has to do with the anonymity of the internet. People don’t have to face up to their criticism. Recently, a lovely young woman did an informational video for YouTube. One person wrote a nasty comment and then there was another and another. WTH? Why? To what end? Fortunately, the young woman had enough confidence to know it wasn’t about her or the video, it was about the small mindedness of some crotchety people looking for a thrill. Still others seem to get the thrill of slamming a book in a review on Amazon or a publisher site. Not because they didn’t really enjoy the book, but because they can.

Frankly, I don’t have time for it. There is rarely a day that goes by that some blog isn’t posting the negative aspects of some argument. (Again, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for exposing wrong or showing the other side of the coin, that’s not what I’m talking about.) I have enough stuff going on in my life without worrying what my neighbor or another author is doing. It just doesn’t matter.

I just want to sit at my computer and create the coolest characters in the best setting doing some sexy stuff while they’re in danger. I refuse to get rolled into the dense fog of negativity … it’s just not productive.

0 Responses to The “No’s” have it

  • Negativity is catching. It just rolls over everyone like a giant wave of puke. I’m sick of it too, Nina. Well said. I suggest we find some happy, positive people and stick to them like glue.

  • Thanks for posting this, Nina. We actually have two small pins that we pass around at our office – one says “Crabby Abby” and is shaped like a crab, the other says “Negative Nancy” and is, ironically, shaped like a clown hat. When someone is being crabby or negative – you guessed it – they get the pin! Sometimes that’s enough to let them know they’re being dunderheads and they put an end to it. I frequently wish there was a button to push or a label to apply to negative/hateful sites on the web…

    See you at RomantiCon!!


  • Hi Nina, you hit the nail on the proverbial head, there’s no accountability for those misbehaving. Of course, it’s very revealing about the lack of character and ethics for those who hide being the anonymity of the Internet. It reminds me of a few years ago when there was a technical glitch in Canada Amazon where commenters’ real names of nasty commenters who were authors were exposed to the world. If accountability can ever be enforced on the Internet, then perhaps some of this can be curbed, but I see this mindset in almost everything in the world today and it is truly disgusting because truly we become what we think. There seem to be a lot of very angry people walking around.

  • Regina – I love that “a giant wave of puke”. That is so true. Too bad nice things didn’t seem to stick as well.

    Cai – I LOVE the pin idea. Especially if the person isn’t aware that they’re affecting others negatively. Gosh, I think we need one of those for blog posts and rude internet comments. 😉

    Sally – and that’s the truth “a lot of angry people walking around” and it’s all very sad.

  • Oh, I’m getting a premonition. A blog – Rudest Blogger of the Week where visitors leave nominations on your blog and then you send the blogger a Nastiest Blogger in the World graphic so they can put it on their site. You could have different levels, like Most Vicious Blogger, Vilest Blogger, Rudest Blogger, and Downright Evil Blogger. Of course, they’d probably think it was a genuine honor and be proud of the award, LOL. Then you could have a sister blog that sniffs out the aliases and exposes them. LOL.

  • Sally – I love it! Unfortunately I think many of them would wear the title with pride. 🙁

  • You are so right, Nina!
    I can’t stand to be around negative people! I used to work in an office that as soon as I walked in the negativity was like a heavy blanket that just weighed down on me right away. It was awful! Positive people who can find joy and peace in the middle of any situation are precious and should be valued.

    And for those who use the faceless/nameless front of the internet to spew their hateful garbage…what must it feel like to walk in your shoes? It must be heavy and awful to carry around that much self-hatred and insecurity that you have to degrade someone else to make yourself feel better. It’s sad. And so are you.

    323-461-PHIL. Call Dr. Phil. Get some therapy.

  • Naima – I couldn’t agree more! Slogging around negativity just weighs on the heart and soul.

  • Sometimes we need to have negative attitudes pointed out to us so we can fix the problem.

    I think you have the right attitude…There’s too much other stuff to do/worry about without dealing with negative people.

    Happy Day.


  • Negativity just makes you tight inside. It’s such a shame and unfortunately must mean there’s an awful lot of people walking around in pain out there with no clue how to help themselves. Thanks for the blog, Nina. You said it beautfully. The sun is shining outside where I am and I am thrilled to be alive today, glitches and all.

  • Jillian – That’s true. Sometimes we’re blind to our own negativity.

    Michelle – With a grateful attitude it’s hard to be negative. Have a great day!

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